Good Day,
I had a wonderful time speaking to a group comprising Parents and children @ Foursquare Gospel Church,Tafawa Balewa Crescent, Surulere,on the 21st of may,2013.
I thought of sharing the following key points from the discussion with you.
A. Sex is Universal
B. Sex is a marketing tool for products, songs,fashion etc
C. Every child is different & parents need to know and understand their child's pin code(s)
D. In the beginning of a project or business, we carry out a SWOT analysis.We do research to ensure that the project or business does not fail.We need to do regular SWOT analysis for children.
E. Parents should:
- create an environment that allow children to express themselves.
- be truthful to their children
- cultivate a cordial relationship with their children. Cordial relationship takes effort and persistence as it grows over time.
-show and express unconditional love to their children.
- instill confidence in their children
- speak positively, words of love and encouragement to children
- train children up in the way of the Lord(This includes sex)
- educate and inform children about sex and its consequences
- teach children to protect themselves from rape or any other form of abuse.
- teach children not to allow anyone touch or fondle with their bodies, especially their sensitive parts.
- keep their disagreement with their spouse from children. It has a negative psychological effect.
- rebuke when necessary. (N.B. Shouting and beating does not really make a child heed to correction, especially teenagers)
The aim of every parent should be to love, not scare the child. Therefore, parents should rebuke their children with love.
In conclusion, times have changed, if we don't teach the younger generation, the world will teach them and this may lead to grievous consequences.
God's grace and strength is available for us. Let's tap into it now.
I Believe In You.
I Believe In The Future Leaders.
I will put a summary of parent's comments at the program tomorrow on this blog.
Please share this message with your friends and families.
Pharm.Oluwatosin Fatungase
@oluwatosinfatun
Thursday, 23 May 2013
Wednesday, 17 April 2013
Ladies, don't get caught.
Rape is a very terrible act. The perpetrators of this evil act could be male or female. The same goes for the victims. Due to the stigma attached to rape, the victims of this act usually keep the incident to themselves. This is especially true in African countries where deeply held cultural beliefs deny the victim the required sympathy and support.
'Since the advent of social media, there has been a rise in the number of reported cases of rape. This is a positive step in the right direction.' Another interesting development is the invention of the 'rape-prevention underwear' by a group of Indian students. You can read more about it here:
http://t.co/E30tLKekaz.
It will definitely take some time before the anti-rape underwear gets to Africa, but while we are waiting for it, I have compiled some helpful tips that can keep you from being raped. I am sure you will find them very useful.
1.) As a lady, avoid going alone to a male person's house, especially if it is someone you don't really know.
2.) Avoid taking any drink or food at a guy's house. You can buy your own drink and keep it in your bag.
3.) As a young lady, carry pepper spray,nail cutter, pens (I know this is not popular in Africa). Keep the items within easy reach, especially if you are going to be alone in a guy's house. They will come handy, if there is a foul play.
4.) Learn some self-defense skills
5.) Avoid late night outings, dark corners and roads.
6.) Avoid entering vehicles with strange faces.
7.) Always inform a responsible friend or adult about your whereabouts.
8.) The rapists can be familiar people.Be ready always.
9.) Do not dress provocatively.
10.) Do not have the false belief that you cannot be raped. Therefore, protect yourself.
My Quotes:
There is no good reason for rape to occur
The rapist and victim can either be male or female
The victim of rape can be destroyed forever.
The victim or rapist can be anyone.
Stop the stigma against rape victims.
Rapists should be punished according to the laws of the land.
The victims should seek help from a professional cousellor.
Gracias
Written By: Pharm. Oluwatosin Fatungase www.2alkaboutit.blogspot.comTosinfatung08@yahoo.com
@oluwatosinfatun
She speaks and motivates future leaders. Also, she consults for parents, teachers and guardians on how to love,train, discipline and communicate effectively with children and teenagers.
Presently, she speaks to over a thousand teenagers monthly at different secondary schools in Lagos, Nigeria.
'Since the advent of social media, there has been a rise in the number of reported cases of rape. This is a positive step in the right direction.' Another interesting development is the invention of the 'rape-prevention underwear' by a group of Indian students. You can read more about it here:
http://t.co/E30tLKekaz.
It will definitely take some time before the anti-rape underwear gets to Africa, but while we are waiting for it, I have compiled some helpful tips that can keep you from being raped. I am sure you will find them very useful.
1.) As a lady, avoid going alone to a male person's house, especially if it is someone you don't really know.
2.) Avoid taking any drink or food at a guy's house. You can buy your own drink and keep it in your bag.
3.) As a young lady, carry pepper spray,nail cutter, pens (I know this is not popular in Africa). Keep the items within easy reach, especially if you are going to be alone in a guy's house. They will come handy, if there is a foul play.
4.) Learn some self-defense skills
5.) Avoid late night outings, dark corners and roads.
6.) Avoid entering vehicles with strange faces.
7.) Always inform a responsible friend or adult about your whereabouts.
8.) The rapists can be familiar people.Be ready always.
9.) Do not dress provocatively.
10.) Do not have the false belief that you cannot be raped. Therefore, protect yourself.
My Quotes:
There is no good reason for rape to occur
The rapist and victim can either be male or female
The victim of rape can be destroyed forever.
The victim or rapist can be anyone.
Stop the stigma against rape victims.
Rapists should be punished according to the laws of the land.
The victims should seek help from a professional cousellor.
Gracias
Written By: Pharm. Oluwatosin Fatungase www.2alkaboutit.blogspot.comTosinfatung08@yahoo.com
@oluwatosinfatun
She speaks and motivates future leaders. Also, she consults for parents, teachers and guardians on how to love,train, discipline and communicate effectively with children and teenagers.
Presently, she speaks to over a thousand teenagers monthly at different secondary schools in Lagos, Nigeria.
Sunday, 17 March 2013
Rape Expos'e 3
This is the story of a family that was robbed and their daughters raped.
It was a 5-man gang that besieged this family that Saturday night. After breaking into the jewellery vault and carting away trinkets, the men descended on these two daughters. Both daughters were raped by these five men.
It was a terrible ordeal and due to the shame, they all pretended that the incident never occurred.
The ladies were hurt, dehumanised and they could not wash away the memory of that incident.
Consequently, they hated men and they were focused in all they set their hearts to do. They grew to be elites in the society and they became familiar with lesbians. Finally, they became lesbians.
General Points:
1). Rape is a terrible act
2). Both men and women can be perpetrators or victims of this terrible act.
3). From the above story, this family was robbed both physically and emotionally.
4). Their self-worth and confidence can only be restored by God's grace and good professional counsel.
Please Note: I know quite a number of people have been raped and don't know what to do next. This can lead to one indulging in wrong practices or associations.
A victim of rape deserves love, care, kindness, compassion, etc. Personally, I believe that every mess can become a positive message to people. To everyone reaching out for love in order to feel complete, God loves you. Follow his lead and he will settle everything that concerns you.
Please stop the stigma against rape victims. Please support, by sharing this message to all your friends,loved ones and every person you know.
@oluwatosinfatun
Gracias
It was a 5-man gang that besieged this family that Saturday night. After breaking into the jewellery vault and carting away trinkets, the men descended on these two daughters. Both daughters were raped by these five men.
It was a terrible ordeal and due to the shame, they all pretended that the incident never occurred.
The ladies were hurt, dehumanised and they could not wash away the memory of that incident.
Consequently, they hated men and they were focused in all they set their hearts to do. They grew to be elites in the society and they became familiar with lesbians. Finally, they became lesbians.
General Points:
1). Rape is a terrible act
2). Both men and women can be perpetrators or victims of this terrible act.
3). From the above story, this family was robbed both physically and emotionally.
4). Their self-worth and confidence can only be restored by God's grace and good professional counsel.
Please Note: I know quite a number of people have been raped and don't know what to do next. This can lead to one indulging in wrong practices or associations.
A victim of rape deserves love, care, kindness, compassion, etc. Personally, I believe that every mess can become a positive message to people. To everyone reaching out for love in order to feel complete, God loves you. Follow his lead and he will settle everything that concerns you.
Please stop the stigma against rape victims. Please support, by sharing this message to all your friends,loved ones and every person you know.
@oluwatosinfatun
Gracias
Wednesday, 13 March 2013
Rapists Are The Culprits, Not Their Victims.
A rapist as defined by the Thesaurus dictionary, is someone who forces another to have sexual intercourse.
The rapist can either be a male or female. The act of rape can be done singly or as a group of people. The victim can be a child or an adult.
There are several factors that might lead to the terrible act of rape. They include:
1). Pornography
2). Anger
3). The desire for power
4). Sadism
5). Sexual gratification and
6). Evolutionary pressures
The act of rape is very terrible and the perpetrator needs to see a psychologist. Also, the rapist should be prosecuted and charged according to the laws of the land.
Most of the time, the victims of rape are scared and ashamed to tell anyone because of the stigma. Also, they might be blamed for the cause of the act of rape, due to improper dressing,location, etc.
Rape is a very terrible act. There is no reason or excuse for rape. If you have a problem as a rapist, seek help from a psychologist,work on your character (Self-discipline) and adhere to proper counsel or recommendation.
Stop the stigma against rape victims. Please your suggestions and contributions are welcome.
Please call: 08075304034
Gracias
The rapist can either be a male or female. The act of rape can be done singly or as a group of people. The victim can be a child or an adult.
There are several factors that might lead to the terrible act of rape. They include:
1). Pornography
2). Anger
3). The desire for power
4). Sadism
5). Sexual gratification and
6). Evolutionary pressures
The act of rape is very terrible and the perpetrator needs to see a psychologist. Also, the rapist should be prosecuted and charged according to the laws of the land.
Most of the time, the victims of rape are scared and ashamed to tell anyone because of the stigma. Also, they might be blamed for the cause of the act of rape, due to improper dressing,location, etc.
Rape is a very terrible act. There is no reason or excuse for rape. If you have a problem as a rapist, seek help from a psychologist,work on your character (Self-discipline) and adhere to proper counsel or recommendation.
Stop the stigma against rape victims. Please your suggestions and contributions are welcome.
Please call: 08075304034
Gracias
Monday, 11 March 2013
Rape, A Terrible Act
The month of march has been fabulous, I have been writing on rape.A lot of people have written to me about their experiences and the aftermaths.I hate the act of rape, because it destroys the victim most of the time.
Rape can lead to the victim having:
1). Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
2). Depression
3). Self-injury/ self-harm
4). Substance abuse
5). Flashbacks
6). Sexually Transmitted Infections
7). Pregnancy
8). Borderline personality disorder
9). Stockholm syndrome ( the victim has emotional bonding with the abuser), etc.
There is no excuse for anyone to carry out the evil act of rape.Rapists need help and they should be charged according to the laws of the land.
The victims of rape need love, care and they need to visit a psychologist regularly.
Please let's stop the stigma against rape victims.They need our love and support.Let's protect our families, friends, neighbours and colleagues from rape.
Please join and support us in this campaign.
For more information,call :
08075304034
Gracias
Rape can lead to the victim having:
1). Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
2). Depression
3). Self-injury/ self-harm
4). Substance abuse
5). Flashbacks
6). Sexually Transmitted Infections
7). Pregnancy
8). Borderline personality disorder
9). Stockholm syndrome ( the victim has emotional bonding with the abuser), etc.
There is no excuse for anyone to carry out the evil act of rape.Rapists need help and they should be charged according to the laws of the land.
The victims of rape need love, care and they need to visit a psychologist regularly.
Please let's stop the stigma against rape victims.They need our love and support.Let's protect our families, friends, neighbours and colleagues from rape.
Please join and support us in this campaign.
For more information,call :
08075304034
Gracias
Wednesday, 6 March 2013
Playboy, So What?
A young handsome man was known by people as a playboy.He was proud about it, and the ladies kept on flocking around him, but he told his friend on a particular day, how it all started.
He was from a wealthy home and his parents were never at home most of the time.He was practically raised by the househelp.He hardly saw his parents, they leave the house early in the morning and get back home late in the night when he will be asleep.
The househelp was a 27year old lady.She allowed him to watch any kind of movie, especially pornographic movies. She told him that they can practice what they watched and she would teach him what to do. He was just 7years old when he had his first sexual experience.
She taught him a lot and he enjoyed it.This continued until she got married and left the house. He started sleeping with girls in his class, but they were not experienced. He moved to sleeping with his seniors.This continued until he got to the university.
He enjoyed his fame and wealth. He did not care about anything else, he was enjoying himself.In his final year, he got very sick and they carried out HIV test on him and he was positive.He felt the world crashing at his feet. He blamed his parents for been too busy, the househelp for the exposure to sex and himself for not seeking help.
Points:
1) He had his first sexual experience with the househelp at the age of 7.
2) His sexual appetite grew and when the househelp left, he started sleeping with different girls.
Questions To Ask Yourself:
Are you been influenced by your past?
What efforts are you taking to become better?
Lessons: We are from different backgrounds and this might influence our actions.We should avoid the same mistakes our
parents made.We have to do this by taking conscious efforts.
A child exposed to sex and its vices affects ones life.The truth is you can choose to make its impact positive or negative, if its negative, seek good and proper counsel.
Remember, there is no challenge that you cannot overcome.The first step is for you to seek good counsel from a professional.
Gracias
He was from a wealthy home and his parents were never at home most of the time.He was practically raised by the househelp.He hardly saw his parents, they leave the house early in the morning and get back home late in the night when he will be asleep.
The househelp was a 27year old lady.She allowed him to watch any kind of movie, especially pornographic movies. She told him that they can practice what they watched and she would teach him what to do. He was just 7years old when he had his first sexual experience.
She taught him a lot and he enjoyed it.This continued until she got married and left the house. He started sleeping with girls in his class, but they were not experienced. He moved to sleeping with his seniors.This continued until he got to the university.
He enjoyed his fame and wealth. He did not care about anything else, he was enjoying himself.In his final year, he got very sick and they carried out HIV test on him and he was positive.He felt the world crashing at his feet. He blamed his parents for been too busy, the househelp for the exposure to sex and himself for not seeking help.
Points:
1) He had his first sexual experience with the househelp at the age of 7.
2) His sexual appetite grew and when the househelp left, he started sleeping with different girls.
Questions To Ask Yourself:
Are you been influenced by your past?
What efforts are you taking to become better?
Lessons: We are from different backgrounds and this might influence our actions.We should avoid the same mistakes our
parents made.We have to do this by taking conscious efforts.
A child exposed to sex and its vices affects ones life.The truth is you can choose to make its impact positive or negative, if its negative, seek good and proper counsel.
Remember, there is no challenge that you cannot overcome.The first step is for you to seek good counsel from a professional.
Gracias
Monday, 4 March 2013
Rape Expos'e 2
This is the story of a young girl who was raped from a tender age by her uncle, cousins and neighbour at different times.This happened because her parents were not always at home and she was left with them at different times.
This led to her having low self-esteem and her sexual urge increased. She started masturbating uncontrollably.Finally, she told her friend about her predictament and was advised to seek good counsel.She went for counselling, she was prayed with, encouraged and cared for. She stopped masturbating, but she was always scared of home.
Points:
She was raped by five different guys at different times, because her parents left her alone at home, most times.
Questions To Ask Yourself:
Are you in a compromising situation?
Are you willing to get help?
Lessons: Parents and guardians should protect their children or wards at all times.Every person that has been abused should go for good counsel.This would help to boost and restore the self-esteem.
Please, do not put yourself in a vulnerable position. No matter what happens or what has happened in the past, I want you to know that, Jesus Loves You.
Please Stop The Stigma Against Rape Victims.
Gracias
This led to her having low self-esteem and her sexual urge increased. She started masturbating uncontrollably.Finally, she told her friend about her predictament and was advised to seek good counsel.She went for counselling, she was prayed with, encouraged and cared for. She stopped masturbating, but she was always scared of home.
Points:
She was raped by five different guys at different times, because her parents left her alone at home, most times.
Questions To Ask Yourself:
Are you in a compromising situation?
Are you willing to get help?
Lessons: Parents and guardians should protect their children or wards at all times.Every person that has been abused should go for good counsel.This would help to boost and restore the self-esteem.
Please, do not put yourself in a vulnerable position. No matter what happens or what has happened in the past, I want you to know that, Jesus Loves You.
Please Stop The Stigma Against Rape Victims.
Gracias
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